I'm stealing the text below from my buddy Lance because that mother fucker is leading our team in donations. We're up to $1500, but we want to bring in a shitload more. Help me, mother fuckers!
-----------------------------------------
I have decided to join a global movement that is bringing much needed attention to cancers that affect men. I'm doing this by growing a Moustache this Movember, the month formerly known as November. My commitment is to grow a moustache all November and I am hoping that you will support my efforts by making a donation. The funds raised go to the Prostate Cancer Foundation and the Lance Armstrong Foundation (LIVESTRONG).
What many people don't know is that 1 in 6 men will be diagnosed with prostate cancer in their lifetime and testicular cancer is the most common cancer in men aged 18-35. Facts like these have convinced me I should get involved.
To make a donation, you can either:
* Click this link http://us.movember.com/mospace/355596/ and donate online using your credit card or PayPal account , or
* Write a check payable to 'Movember Foundation', referencing my Registration Number 355596 and mailing it to: Movember Foundation, PO Box 2726, Venice, CA 90294-2726.
All donations are tax deductible to the extent permitted by law.
The Prostate Cancer Foundation will use the money raised by Movember to fund research to find better treatments and a cure for prostate cancer.
The Lance Armstrong Foundation will use the money raised by Movember to fund:
* The LIVESTRONG Young Adult Alliance program which has the goal of improving survival rates and quality of life for young adults with cancer between the ages of 15 and 40.
* Research initiatives to further understand the biology of adolescent and young adult cancers.
For more details on how the funds raised from previous campaigns have been used and the impact Movember is having please go to http://us.movember.com/mospace/355596/
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Laaazzzzyyyy
I was going to post something new, but I'm so fucking lazy I can't even motivate myself to do it. How is it that I had multiple posts on the same day for so long back in the days of "Diary of a Fatman"?
Maybe it's all the time I wasted on the boards and on Twitter. I blow my humor load in 140 characters or less (much like my literal load in 120 seconds or less).
Maybe I'll write something tonight. Laurie is out of town for three days. I'll try to fit something in between the violent bouts of masturbation.
Tata.
Maybe it's all the time I wasted on the boards and on Twitter. I blow my humor load in 140 characters or less (much like my literal load in 120 seconds or less).
Maybe I'll write something tonight. Laurie is out of town for three days. I'll try to fit something in between the violent bouts of masturbation.
Tata.
Friday, April 24, 2009
G1 vs iPhone Review
Until it died a miserable death in New Orleans, I had been using a secondhand iPhone that I bought from my coworker last fall. I LOVED that phone. The whole cult of Apple thing annoys the shit out of me, but I drank about half a cup of Steve Jobs flavored Kool-Aid once I started using my iPhone.
I tried to get a new iPhone via a swap at the Apple Store, but the phone had been out of warranty for FOUR months. I could have paid $199 to replace it with another 2nd gen phone, but I was really interested in upgrading to a 3g phone. My problem: I wasn't an AT&T customer and I was only six months in on two-year contract with T-Mobile.
I debated buying a 3G for $199, paying the activation, cancelling, and then eating the early termination fee of $250, but there was no way my wife would be OK with me dropping almost $500 for a phone.
Once I made that decision, there was really only one other choice that could get me even close to the capabilities of the iPhone: the G1.
I bought the G1 last week from T-Mobile for $97.97 (a price match with Wal-Mart) by adding a third line to my account for Evan. He's been using a prepaid T-Mobile account for a while and I'm probably averaging close to that in prepaid minutes. We put the phone and data plan ($24.95 per month for 3g Internet & 400 text messages) on my number. I don't have an exact total yet, but my total bill will be around $110 a month for three lines.
Technical Specs
iPhone:
Size and weight
Height: 4.5 inches (115.5 mm)
Width: 2.4 inches (62.1 mm)
Depth: 0.48 inch (12.3 mm)
Weight: 4.7 ounces (133 grams)
Display: 3.5 inches (diagonal) 480X320 resolution @163ppi
G1:
Height: 4.6 inches (117.7 mm)
Width: 2.16 inches (55.7 mm)
Depth: 0.62 inches (17.1 mm)
Weight: 5.6 ounces (158 grams)
Display: 3.2 inches (diagonal) 320X480 resolution
All of my comments should be prefaced with this: if you've never had an iPhone, you'll without a doubt, love the G1. If I had started on the G1, I would have never wanted an iPhone.
Display/Touchscreen
Although .3 of an inch doesn't sound like much, it seems like a lot when you're looking at the screen, especially when watching videos in landscape mode (which is the ONLY mode you can watch videos in on the iPhone. That said, the G1's display is more than adequate for watching videos, streaming YouTube vids, or general web browsing.
There's a lot of hype surrounding the iPhone's multitouch capability, but it's miraculous qualities are a bunch of marketing crap. Yes, the pinch and stretch feature is useful when surfing the web, but I really don't miss it. Both the default browser in the G1 and Steel (which is a free download from the Android Market) do a great job of easily zooming in and scrolling around pages that are too large to display on one screen. Opera Mini does NOT do well with it. I downloaded, installed, and kicked it to the fucking curb all within 30 minutes.
The sensitivity on the G1 is slightly kludgy. I'm fairly certain it's a software issue, as some apps are better than others in recognizing where you are touching. As Android and it's related apps mature, I think (and hope) that this will improve
The winner on the display is the iPhone by a SMIDGE.
User Interface
The iPhone user interface is pretty fucking sweet, but after using Android for a week, I think it's much better.
1) You can have apps run in the background. This is awesome for things like Twitter (using Twidroid as the Interface), Facebook (FBook--we'll get to that later), Calendar items, etc. With those items running in the background, you can actually get notifications up in the top toolbar. When an email comes in, I get a "@" symbol, when a new Tweet comes in, I get a little robot, with Facebook, you get the F square icon. You can then touch the top toolbar and drag it down to see the notification and launch the app. I have a Calendar app that puts your upcoming appointments in the dragged down section of the toolbar so that it's always easily available.
As I stated earlier, the touchscreen is a little flaky, but once you get accustomed to the flakiness (mmm, biscuits) it's easy to get around. There are three desktop views (similar to the ones on the iPhone). You can dock apps on those screens and switch screens with a swipe of your finger. You can also set bookmarks on the desktop (for frequently used sites) and also add folders (I'm assuming for categorizing apps).
In addition, there's a dock at the bottom (the square with a triangle). If you touch that dock, it will open and show you all the apps installed on your phone.
If you want to move something, just press and hold it for a couple of seconds, you'll hear a beep and feel a little buzz (that's what she said) and you can move the icon around (even from the docked folder to a home desktop).
NOW, I really like the trackball. The first day it took a little getting used to. It's awesome for scrolling down webpages (especially Google Reader). There are a ton of non-intuitive things that you can do, so if you buy a G1, hit the web for tips (like clicking the alt key before using it to make it move faster, among others).
My only hardware bitch is that the camera button is hard to press, even if the keyboard isn't open (why yes, yes this does have REAL keyboard). Thankfully, once the Camera app is launched, you can use the trackball to take a pic. Another issue is that it takes a few seconds to take the pic because the camera (3.2 megapixels) actually has a focus mechanism that is engaged prior to snapping the picture. But, it takes pretty decent looking pics.
The keyboard is pretty decent too. I have big, fat fingers and haven't had a lot of problems adjusting to typing on the small keys. From my experience playing around with my sister-in-law's Blackberry, the G1's keys are bigger and have a better feel. Compared to the virtual keyboard on the iPhone, the G1 is like heaven. It IS slightly annoying, however, to have to open the keyboard when you're in portrait mode and just want to type in a URL. Steel is cool for that, as it also includes a virtual keyboard for just that occasion. The newest version of the Android OS (aka Cupcake) is supposed to address that and make that available at all times.
I tried to get a new iPhone via a swap at the Apple Store, but the phone had been out of warranty for FOUR months. I could have paid $199 to replace it with another 2nd gen phone, but I was really interested in upgrading to a 3g phone. My problem: I wasn't an AT&T customer and I was only six months in on two-year contract with T-Mobile.
I debated buying a 3G for $199, paying the activation, cancelling, and then eating the early termination fee of $250, but there was no way my wife would be OK with me dropping almost $500 for a phone.
Once I made that decision, there was really only one other choice that could get me even close to the capabilities of the iPhone: the G1.
I bought the G1 last week from T-Mobile for $97.97 (a price match with Wal-Mart) by adding a third line to my account for Evan. He's been using a prepaid T-Mobile account for a while and I'm probably averaging close to that in prepaid minutes. We put the phone and data plan ($24.95 per month for 3g Internet & 400 text messages) on my number. I don't have an exact total yet, but my total bill will be around $110 a month for three lines.
Technical Specs
iPhone:
Size and weight
Height: 4.5 inches (115.5 mm)
Width: 2.4 inches (62.1 mm)
Depth: 0.48 inch (12.3 mm)
Weight: 4.7 ounces (133 grams)
Display: 3.5 inches (diagonal) 480X320 resolution @163ppi
G1:
Height: 4.6 inches (117.7 mm)
Width: 2.16 inches (55.7 mm)
Depth: 0.62 inches (17.1 mm)
Weight: 5.6 ounces (158 grams)
Display: 3.2 inches (diagonal) 320X480 resolution
All of my comments should be prefaced with this: if you've never had an iPhone, you'll without a doubt, love the G1. If I had started on the G1, I would have never wanted an iPhone.
Display/Touchscreen
Although .3 of an inch doesn't sound like much, it seems like a lot when you're looking at the screen, especially when watching videos in landscape mode (which is the ONLY mode you can watch videos in on the iPhone. That said, the G1's display is more than adequate for watching videos, streaming YouTube vids, or general web browsing.
There's a lot of hype surrounding the iPhone's multitouch capability, but it's miraculous qualities are a bunch of marketing crap. Yes, the pinch and stretch feature is useful when surfing the web, but I really don't miss it. Both the default browser in the G1 and Steel (which is a free download from the Android Market) do a great job of easily zooming in and scrolling around pages that are too large to display on one screen. Opera Mini does NOT do well with it. I downloaded, installed, and kicked it to the fucking curb all within 30 minutes.
The sensitivity on the G1 is slightly kludgy. I'm fairly certain it's a software issue, as some apps are better than others in recognizing where you are touching. As Android and it's related apps mature, I think (and hope) that this will improve
The winner on the display is the iPhone by a SMIDGE.
User Interface
The iPhone user interface is pretty fucking sweet, but after using Android for a week, I think it's much better.
1) You can have apps run in the background. This is awesome for things like Twitter (using Twidroid as the Interface), Facebook (FBook--we'll get to that later), Calendar items, etc. With those items running in the background, you can actually get notifications up in the top toolbar. When an email comes in, I get a "@" symbol, when a new Tweet comes in, I get a little robot, with Facebook, you get the F square icon. You can then touch the top toolbar and drag it down to see the notification and launch the app. I have a Calendar app that puts your upcoming appointments in the dragged down section of the toolbar so that it's always easily available.
As I stated earlier, the touchscreen is a little flaky, but once you get accustomed to the flakiness (mmm, biscuits) it's easy to get around. There are three desktop views (similar to the ones on the iPhone). You can dock apps on those screens and switch screens with a swipe of your finger. You can also set bookmarks on the desktop (for frequently used sites) and also add folders (I'm assuming for categorizing apps).In addition, there's a dock at the bottom (the square with a triangle). If you touch that dock, it will open and show you all the apps installed on your phone.
If you want to move something, just press and hold it for a couple of seconds, you'll hear a beep and feel a little buzz (that's what she said) and you can move the icon around (even from the docked folder to a home desktop).
NOW, I really like the trackball. The first day it took a little getting used to. It's awesome for scrolling down webpages (especially Google Reader). There are a ton of non-intuitive things that you can do, so if you buy a G1, hit the web for tips (like clicking the alt key before using it to make it move faster, among others).
My only hardware bitch is that the camera button is hard to press, even if the keyboard isn't open (why yes, yes this does have REAL keyboard). Thankfully, once the Camera app is launched, you can use the trackball to take a pic. Another issue is that it takes a few seconds to take the pic because the camera (3.2 megapixels) actually has a focus mechanism that is engaged prior to snapping the picture. But, it takes pretty decent looking pics.
The keyboard is pretty decent too. I have big, fat fingers and haven't had a lot of problems adjusting to typing on the small keys. From my experience playing around with my sister-in-law's Blackberry, the G1's keys are bigger and have a better feel. Compared to the virtual keyboard on the iPhone, the G1 is like heaven. It IS slightly annoying, however, to have to open the keyboard when you're in portrait mode and just want to type in a URL. Steel is cool for that, as it also includes a virtual keyboard for just that occasion. The newest version of the Android OS (aka Cupcake) is supposed to address that and make that available at all times.
Call Quality
It's pretty much a tie. I really don't notice any difference in the quality of voice calls.
Data Speeds
My G1 is faster than the iPhone, but I went from a 2nd gen iPhone (Edge) to a 3g phone. My cubicle-mate has a 3g iPhone and I'll do a side by side test once she gets back in the office to compare speeds.
Apps
As fucking annoying and douchey as the iPhone app commercials are, they really do have an app for everything (explosive diarrhea? There's an app for it). Android gets beat the fuck up in a head to head battle. The Android store is still in it's infancy, so I hope that improves as more hardware companies turn to Android for the OS.
Here are the apps that I used constantly and miss: Mint*, Chase Mobile*, Yelp*, Amazon.com*, Zynga Poker, Facebook**.
*Can use a browser based workaround on G1, but it's not as good
**Similar app on G1, but it sucks balls
There are several apps that I didn't have on the iPhone that rock (particularly Barcode Scanner), but overall the Android Market is stinky like feta.
Battery Life
Good lord, if you had told me there was a device even WORSE than the iPhone when it came to battery life, I would have called you a pinche mentirosa. But there is...the battery life on the G1 is a fucking JOKE. The only positive is that you can actually GET to the battery, but I usually have to throw it on a charge around 3pm with modest usage. Sure, you can kill wifi, location awareness, GPS, data syncing, etc, but those are the things that make the phone fucking cool. Thankfully, you can charge via a USB connection, so I just plug it in to my PC at work to give it a refresh in the afternoon. God help you if you are ever on the road and don't have a mobile charger.
Other
Yes, the G1 plays music. Yes, the headphones are proprietary too! Memory is expandable to 16Gb via SDHC cards. It doesn't support Flash either (yet).
Things to Get
Apps: Twidroid (twitter), Fbook (sucks, but not as bad as the full-on mobile interface), Steel (web browser), Sky Map (fucking AMAZING app that uses GPS, location awareness, & the accelerometer to show you astronomical data), Useful Switchers (allows you to toggle on/off Gps, Wifi, Location, etc), Ringroid (turns MP3s into ringtones), Quick Calendar (puts your appointments in the taskbar)
Other: Invisible Shield-excellent cover for your screen. Be careful when you apply it!
Overall, I'm really please with the G1. It took a week of using it to really appreciate the things it does better than the iPhone, which offsets the things it still lacks.
The G1 gets a B. If they can fix the battery drain and get some better apps, I'll be a happy end user.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Buzzball
"At the heart of the Buzzball is a dual motor configuration, enabling the pilot to control the motion and direction of travel via left and right control triggers, which provides power to the driving wheels.
The amount of power applied to each wheel will determine the direction the Buzzball moves. Powering one wheel will spin the pod and pilot on it's axis around the inside of the ball changing the direction of travel. If power is applied equally to both wheels the pod will rear up as the wheels climb up the face of the ball forcing the ball to rotate around the pod and powering the Buzzball forward..."
Must. Have. Now.
The amount of power applied to each wheel will determine the direction the Buzzball moves. Powering one wheel will spin the pod and pilot on it's axis around the inside of the ball changing the direction of travel. If power is applied equally to both wheels the pod will rear up as the wheels climb up the face of the ball forcing the ball to rotate around the pod and powering the Buzzball forward..."
Must. Have. Now.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Party Like a Mock Star
Another year has ROCKETED by. Time is a cruel bitch when you get older. It always seemed to drag on in my youth, but now that I've hit middle age, it's a greasy pig that I can't wrap my arms around.
Laurie and I were talking about what we're doing with the cars when they're paid off. I think her Explorer will finally be paid off next year, mine not until 2012. I mentioned that I was going to hold on to my Focus and give it to Evan, not realizing actually how close that is. He'll be old enough to drive in just over four years. Even more immediate is the fact that he's going to be a teenager in just over a year.
How the fuck did that happen? It's seems like it was just a short time ago that he was the little baby pissing and puking all over me at the drop of a hat.
Although there were some craptacular moments this year (Chloe getting infected with crypto [like she's some kind of fucking third worlder or something], cancelling the summer vacation because we had to pay off a lawsuit, the little misunderstanding in March that almost ended my marriage), 2008 was a damn fine year in our household.
2009 will be a year of the fat wallet. Financially, we're doing better than ever. 2009 will be even more so with me getting an almost 8% raise. If things work out, I hope to get a grade increase too, which would be another $10K a year. Now I just need to get a reign on our expenses because we piss our money away like, uhm, piss. Hence the term, piss away.
2009 will be the year that I drop all the weight I gained over the last three years. In 2005, I lost almost 60 pounds. When I got sick and quit running (and started eating like Kirstie Alley at her most voracious), I gained over 80 fucking pounds. 80. Eight. Zero. I started dieting a two weeks ago and I'm down about 10, even with the slacking over Christmas (and all the boozing). There are 8 people in my office that have all thrown $100 in the pot and we're having a Biggest Loser contest. Whoever looses the highest percentage of weight gets the pot. Hello flatscreen TV when I win.
2009 will be a year of more traveling. We had planned on starting back the annual trip to Panama City Beach again in 08, but we were derailed by those douche drinking cock monkeys at Capital One (choke on my money, fucknuts). We also had planned on taking the kids back to Colorado, but instead we spent my 35th birthday living it up in Vegas. In 2009, the plans are: January: I'm working 11 days in New Orleans and Laurie is coming out for the first weekend to hang out and partay; June(ish): 1 week in Florida; October/November: 3-5 Nights in Vegas (no kiddos); Christmas: New York City (get a rope). Mix in a few weekends in Shreveport and or Austin/San Antonio/Houston and you got yourself a lot of travel.
2009 will be a year of more business travel. Man, that's a beating. In 2008, I spent a little over 60 days traveling. I'm starting the year out in New Orleans from the 9th until the 20th. And that's just for one job...I have seven other relocations that are going to be ramping up next year, so I anticipate a LOT of time drinking Abitas and eating crawfish in New Orleans (Gretna & Covington), Houma, New Iberia, Lake Charles, Natchitoches, & Minden next year. The upside of all the traveling is that several of my personal trips are done using free airfare and I make a shitload of money in overtime. In 2008, that came out to a cool ten gees.
2009 will be a year of more partying. I think both Laurie and I are hitting our midlife crises. Now that the kids are a little older and we have a couple of friends, we're drinking a little more (at least she is, I've been boozing it up for a while) and socializing more. Now if I can only talk her into some fishbowl parties, then I'm set like Boba Fett.
So, unless somebody dies, 2009 should rock the hizzouse. However, it will be coming in with a whisper since we have no plans tonight. Our usual social buddies are in NM visiting relatives, so we're just going to sit around the house tonight. I think my in-laws are coming over to play Scene It Box Office on the Xbox360 (thanks, Santa!) I'm sure I'll drink a few tasty beverages and pop a few tasty pills...but there's a distinct possibility that I'll be zzz'ing out by 11pm.
Happy New Year to all and to all a good night.
Laurie and I were talking about what we're doing with the cars when they're paid off. I think her Explorer will finally be paid off next year, mine not until 2012. I mentioned that I was going to hold on to my Focus and give it to Evan, not realizing actually how close that is. He'll be old enough to drive in just over four years. Even more immediate is the fact that he's going to be a teenager in just over a year.
How the fuck did that happen? It's seems like it was just a short time ago that he was the little baby pissing and puking all over me at the drop of a hat.
Although there were some craptacular moments this year (Chloe getting infected with crypto [like she's some kind of fucking third worlder or something], cancelling the summer vacation because we had to pay off a lawsuit, the little misunderstanding in March that almost ended my marriage), 2008 was a damn fine year in our household.
2009 will be a year of the fat wallet. Financially, we're doing better than ever. 2009 will be even more so with me getting an almost 8% raise. If things work out, I hope to get a grade increase too, which would be another $10K a year. Now I just need to get a reign on our expenses because we piss our money away like, uhm, piss. Hence the term, piss away.
2009 will be the year that I drop all the weight I gained over the last three years. In 2005, I lost almost 60 pounds. When I got sick and quit running (and started eating like Kirstie Alley at her most voracious), I gained over 80 fucking pounds. 80. Eight. Zero. I started dieting a two weeks ago and I'm down about 10, even with the slacking over Christmas (and all the boozing). There are 8 people in my office that have all thrown $100 in the pot and we're having a Biggest Loser contest. Whoever looses the highest percentage of weight gets the pot. Hello flatscreen TV when I win.
2009 will be a year of more traveling. We had planned on starting back the annual trip to Panama City Beach again in 08, but we were derailed by those douche drinking cock monkeys at Capital One (choke on my money, fucknuts). We also had planned on taking the kids back to Colorado, but instead we spent my 35th birthday living it up in Vegas. In 2009, the plans are: January: I'm working 11 days in New Orleans and Laurie is coming out for the first weekend to hang out and partay; June(ish): 1 week in Florida; October/November: 3-5 Nights in Vegas (no kiddos); Christmas: New York City (get a rope). Mix in a few weekends in Shreveport and or Austin/San Antonio/Houston and you got yourself a lot of travel.
2009 will be a year of more business travel. Man, that's a beating. In 2008, I spent a little over 60 days traveling. I'm starting the year out in New Orleans from the 9th until the 20th. And that's just for one job...I have seven other relocations that are going to be ramping up next year, so I anticipate a LOT of time drinking Abitas and eating crawfish in New Orleans (Gretna & Covington), Houma, New Iberia, Lake Charles, Natchitoches, & Minden next year. The upside of all the traveling is that several of my personal trips are done using free airfare and I make a shitload of money in overtime. In 2008, that came out to a cool ten gees.
2009 will be a year of more partying. I think both Laurie and I are hitting our midlife crises. Now that the kids are a little older and we have a couple of friends, we're drinking a little more (at least she is, I've been boozing it up for a while) and socializing more. Now if I can only talk her into some fishbowl parties, then I'm set like Boba Fett.
So, unless somebody dies, 2009 should rock the hizzouse. However, it will be coming in with a whisper since we have no plans tonight. Our usual social buddies are in NM visiting relatives, so we're just going to sit around the house tonight. I think my in-laws are coming over to play Scene It Box Office on the Xbox360 (thanks, Santa!) I'm sure I'll drink a few tasty beverages and pop a few tasty pills...but there's a distinct possibility that I'll be zzz'ing out by 11pm.
Happy New Year to all and to all a good night.
Friday, November 14, 2008
Irrational Fears
1) Closing my eyes in the shower. I'm always afraid that when I'm done washing my face and head, that the freaky-walk chick from The Ring is going to be six inches away from my face.
2) Eating lunchmeat/deli meat when the package has been open for more than 3-4 days. In my head, I understand that it's probably good for WEEKS with all of the shit they put in it, but I'll toss out a whole package of meat if it's not gone in a couple of days.
3) Having an alligator and/or snake climb up through the sewers and bite my ballsack whilst I'm sitting on the toilet. I don't believe the pain could be totally offset by the coolness of having teabagged a reptile.
4) Midday phone calls from my wife. My heart starts pounding and my mind races. "What the fuck did she find?" I'm 99.99% certain that I'm not doing anything wrong, but that .01% fucks with my mind. What if I'm downloading Asian Piss Porn in my sleep?
2) Eating lunchmeat/deli meat when the package has been open for more than 3-4 days. In my head, I understand that it's probably good for WEEKS with all of the shit they put in it, but I'll toss out a whole package of meat if it's not gone in a couple of days.
3) Having an alligator and/or snake climb up through the sewers and bite my ballsack whilst I'm sitting on the toilet. I don't believe the pain could be totally offset by the coolness of having teabagged a reptile.
4) Midday phone calls from my wife. My heart starts pounding and my mind races. "What the fuck did she find?" I'm 99.99% certain that I'm not doing anything wrong, but that .01% fucks with my mind. What if I'm downloading Asian Piss Porn in my sleep?
Friday, October 10, 2008
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